“I am sure she’s sad she’s single-.”
“- it must be so hard for her being single!”
“- I can’t believe she’s not married at this age.”
“- how at all is she coping with not being in a relationship?”
“- she’s probably depressed.”
And on and on are the assumptions of one in single-hood.
Believe it or not, the period where one is single (period before marriage/committed relationship) is a beautiful one.
There is so much talk about being discouraged when one is single and that should never be the case.
I strongly believe, that although marriage is blissful, it is not the calling for everyone to be in marriage. For some, the full effect of their calling in Christ Jesus reaches its maximum without having to be married.
Apostle Paul shares the same sentiments as he says, “Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me- a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is. God gives the gift of the single life to some, the gift of the married life to others.” (MSG 1 corinthians 7:7)
Did you catch that?
To be single is a gift!
To be married is a gift!
You need to understand that at whichever point you may be, you have to learn to enjoy the gift that God has given to you whether single or married.
Before I met my king, I had reached a place where I was totally and completely happy being single. I was striving to reach my goals and achieve all I could whilst single. And get this, it wasn’t until I was so sure I will be fine with just God that funny enough God brought my king along.
You need to reach a place of wholesomeness in single hood before attaching yourself to someone else as his wife. No one needs a clingy and completely dependant spouse as a partner, do they?
And trust me, once he comes and sees that you are completely whole in yourself; he will know that he needs to add something better to buttress your whole package.
I like how Lady Adelaide Heward Mills says it; “Marriage is made up of two whole people coming together. Not two halves.”
So, go out and enjoy your season of singlehood. Fill a cup at pinkberry
and with giddy delight have a spoonful:
Queen Esther became a star even before she met King Ahasuerus!
As a single woman she was known as Hadassah and she become a star (Esther) whilst single. I’ll bet when King Ahasuerus met her, he thought to himself, “Wow, even without me she’s a star.”
Dear Queen, marriage does not validate who you are in Christ Jesus.
If God believes that in marriage you will fulfil His calling for your life, then it shall be so. If not- don’t force it.
Stop sending texts to that guy who only contacts you when he needs money.
Stop forcing for a relationship with that man that doesn’t see your worth.
Instead, before you are called to marriage; do what you can, glean in the fields (work) like Ruth did, become a star like Hadassah became.
Prepare if you believe marriage is what God has for you:
But please, do not under any circumstance allow anyone to make you feel less than just because you are not married.
And do not fold your arms and wait for Mr. Boo to drop from the skies.
Do what you have to do as God shows you and eventually, all will unfold.
I pray this encourages a queen out there today.
And know this:
Jesus Loves You and I do Too,
Queens in Christ Jesus,